Thursday, June 09, 2005

...The Best of Year One (Part 1 of 2)

I can't say for sure when my blog's anniversary is. I deleted my first post because I suspected that a friend who was mentioned in a not-so-flattering light within the post had discovered my blog (He hadn't, I mistook him for my wife who worked at the same company at the time and thus had the same domain address). Also, it was pretty dumb. So while I can't narrow down the anniversary to an exact date, it's sometime around now.

The idea of picking out my own favorite posts from this blog seems more than a little obnoxious. Comparatively speaking, it's roughly the equivalent of laughing out loud at your own jokes. Then again, what is a blog, really, if not a self-centered, self-absorbed ego-fuck? Plus, I have exactly one week to get my entire house packed up and moved into our new rental, so there's not going to be a whole lot of time for new posts. And it's rerun season anyway. So let's revisit, in no particular order, great moments in "The Gooch On..." history. I'm breaking this up into two posts since many of these are a little on the long side and that's way too much reading in one sitting.

The Forgotten Post
Unlike the faux humble claims of some of my fellow bloggers, I never had any illusions that I was writing "for myself". I wanted recognition for my great wit and clever wordplay from Post 1. Which is why I whored for comments immediately, making lots of unoriginal, marginally funny comments on other people's blogs in hopes that doing so would lead traffic back this way. And for the most part it worked. Except for this post. This is the one post in this blog's history that never received a single comment. What the fuck? Trust me, if you knew the guy, it's hysterical. I know this for a fact because when my sister, who knew the subject in question, discovered my blog this was the first post she mentioned:
A Bizarre Form of Social Retardation

Toilet Humor
One of the great things about having a blog is the way it creates an entirely new audience for some of your oldest stories. For example, my real life friends tend to roll their eyes whenever I begin retelling the incident discussed in the following post. Not because they don't think it's funny, just that it's less so after they've already heard it for the 2000th time. What can I say, I love toilet humor. Shoot me:
How I Rid My House of Pests

Work Posts
Upon entering the blog-o-sphere, I quickly discovered that many of the most popular blogs were the ones that dealt exclusively with the unique occupation of the writer. Whether it was behind the strip club door stories from TJ's Place, tales from the perspective of a bouncer at two of New York's most popular nightclubs or the adventures of a real life Texas police officer, well-written, vocation-specific blogs appeared to guarantee a large readership. Being the part-owner of a small business, I considered for awhile having this blog focus exclusively on the daily adventures of running my start-up company. Problem is A) Compared to the aforementioned professions, tales of running an audio-visual-technology-systems-integration company might appear a bit dull in comparision, B) While I very much enjoy what I do for a living, the last thing I want to do with the few free hours I have away from the office is spend it writing about work (Same concept as how I used to hate it when I'd get home from school and get asked by my parents how my day in school was) & C) There is always that irrational fear of the .01% chance that one of my customers or vendors will discover my blog. But I managed to get a couple decent work-related posts in here. Here's one about my old boss/now business parter, Bob:
Unique Learning Disabilities

and here's one where I rant about all the shithead customers I've dealt with over the years:
How Customers Can Be Sleazeballs Too

The Gooch Manifesto
A lot of bloggers like to use this forum as a means of spouting off their political opinions. Not to be judgemental, but to me these type of posts too often come off as Rush Limbaugh-lite (or Al Franken-lite depending on which side of the politcal fence the blogger sits on). Which is why when I write about my views on the world, they tend to be of a far more mundane variety:
What I've Learned So Far Part I and Part II (nearly a year later, it looks like I was wrong about the American Idol thing considering the pretty girl won this year's edition. Also, a historical note, since writing this post the then-Anaheim Angels become the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. A piece of history right here on "The Gooch On..."
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