Saturday, October 09, 2004

...Self-Indulgent Navel Gazing

Julie H. asked:How did you wind up with/ choose the nickname "Gooch"?
It is an ode to the often mentioned, but never seen tormentor of Arnold on my favorite sitcom of all-time, “ Diff’rent Strokes”. I started using “The Gooch” moniker a few years ago for any on-line activity where I was hesitant to give out my real name.

The Dave asked:If you were an insect about to hit a windshield at 90 mph, which one would you pick and why?
A bee. At least I’d have a chance to say I went down fighting and maybe stung someone on my way out.

With your time left, please expand on the duality of mankind.
I’ll have to get back to you.

Snick asked:How did you and Mrs.Gooch meet?
At work or at a bar, depending on how you look at it. She came to work for the company I was with at the time, but our positions didn’t interact and we worked in different parts of the building so we didn’t see each other much. We “met”, as in actually talked to/got to know each other one night when a group of us went out to drinks after work.

Catt asked:Why did you start blogging? How'd you get into it? What's the attraction for you?
The short answer is my sister started a blog and it seemed like a fun idea. Also, I am a former English major who now works in a completely unrelated field that I very much enjoy but that doesn’t allow much room for my more creative side. This blog provides that.

Tara asked:Ritz or regular saltines? and why?
Ritz for taste, saltines if I have a hangover and feel throw-uppy.

Also, what was your wedding like?
The usual...guests, vows, food, dancing, drinks, a little nookie.

Esther asked: vanilla or chocolate?

Sloth asked: Could you scratch my itch, please?
Depends where it is. I’m married.

Mike asked: 1.How's baby Gooch?
Very well, thank you

2.Do we truly have any control over our destiny? Is time a series of vectors radiating infinitely from every single point, or are they merely arcs leading back to the same ultimate conclusion?
Some, but not complete and a little of both.

3.What's for dinner?
Stuffed pork chops (don’t tell my mom), cream cheese potatoes and sugar snap peas. One of the added benefits of my wife staying at home since the birth of Little Gooch is that she’s turned into a regular Martha Stewart. Every day I come home from work to find new nicknacks decorating the house and a different gourmet meal being prepared. Actually, to be more accurate, she’s turned into a regular Rachael Ray, since I think that’s where she’s getting most of her recipes from.

April asked: What is your biggest talent?
You know what’s sad? I can’t think of anything on Earth that I possess more talent at than the average person. Unless you count knowing a lot of minute trivia about professional wrestling and 70s and 80s sitcoms as talent.

RLB asked: How are your wife's kids (did you adopt them? If so, your kids...) treating Gooch, Jr.?
You have to keep in mind my stepkids are (soon-to-be) 9 and 10, so any free moment they have that isn’t going to school, doing homework, going to soccer/karate practice, Cub Scouts, etc., is usually spent outside doing something with their friends. So a lot of the time I think they forget he is around. But when they are home they are surprisingly sweet with the baby. Ironically, my younger stepson, the one my wife and I were very worried would be jealous and resentful at no longer being the baby of the family, seems far more interested in his new brother (as far as holding/feeding him) than my older one.

Vadergrrrl asked: How many girls have you slept with?
I haven’t even had that conversation with my wife; you think I’m going to do it here? Plus, anytime the answer is "more than a few" people always assume you're lying or bragging anyway.

Let’s just say it's enough that I don't worry about ever going through a mid-life crisis someday where I realize I got married without playing the field enough. I do, on the other hand, as I think I mentioned in another post, kick myself at having stayed faithful during certain long-term relationships that didn’t end up working out, and sometimes try to calculate the hypothetical additional notches to my bedpost that could have been added had I been blessed with 20/20 foresight.

Anne asked: Maryann or Ginger?
Neither. They’re both old enough to be my mother.

Harriene79 asked: Are you the one on the pic found at the upper right?

Pup asked: 1. Flying or invisibility?
Seeing as I’m afraid of flying and doubt I would be any braver even if I could do it myself, I’ll take invisibility.

2. Who wrote the book of love?
Not sure about the book. I’ve always thought Woody Allen made the best, most honest, movies about love - “Annie Hall” and “Manhattan” in particular.

3. What's one thing (material thing) that you wish you had but don't?
Well, as of this writing my Ford Explorer has nearly 200K miles on it and was just returned to me after an overnight stay at the repair shop, so a brand new Hummer H2 has never seemed quite as appealing..

Kim asked: 1. I have a leaky faucet, can you give me some home repair advice?
Yeah, don’t ask for my help.

2. If your wife gained 50 pounds, would you still love her?
No offense, but I hate this type of question because it requires that you answer either
A) In the way that is sure to garner the desired “Awwww” response, and make you come of as sweet, loving and romantic as possible
B) Honestly

3. How tall are you?

Leese asked: 1. I'm with Mikey. How's Baby Gooch?
See above

2. Coming up to the Bay Area anytime soon? Would love to meet Mr. and Mrs. Gooch and kids.
We’ll be up for Thanksgiving. Not sure of exact dates yet.

Cybelle asked: Beatles or Elvis?
Beatles, though I”m not particularly passionate about either, having been born a generation or so too late.

What do you do when no one's looking?
The same thing every other guy on Earth does when no one else is looking.

Aimee asked: Do you breathe under water in your dreams? Do you fly in your dreams?
I have never breathed underwater in my dreams. I have flown in a few.

Sarah asked: do you pee in the shower?
No, but as my brother-in-law, Chef, noted later in the comments I used to have a roommate who was quite open about doing that with regularity, which grossed me out to no end seeing as we shared a shower.

ever wonder if Jesus was the real deal and secretly check in every once in a while?
No. I’ve never claimed to be the world's best Jew, but I’m not a turncoat.

Whoooooooo are you? Tell me who the fark ar you?

Jack Smyde asked: Hey Gooch, what's your secret?

Here’s one - I never learned how to drive a stickshift

Sloth asked: Does your baby sleep through the night?
He has once or twice, but not with any regularity yet. He is only getting us up about once a night now though, instead of twice like before. You’d think this would be a good thing, but instead it just makes my wife and I fight over who has to feed him, since it is a one or the other thing now, as opposed to taking turns like before :-)

Does your heart feel twice as big when you look at wee Gooch?
I find that I’m kind of stuck at the amazement/disbelief stage, where I find myself completely in awe of the fact I actually created this living, breathing, human being.

Do I look fat?
No, butI don’t know that I’ve seen a real recent picture.

Varla asked: Do you now say to baby Gooch "Goochie goochie goo!"?
I would be lying if I didn’t admit that has occurred more than once.
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